pop culture, reviewed

… that Britney would come out at the VMAs without her weave, rocking her shaved head.  That would have been bad ass. 

Instead?  Instead she came out with terror in her eyes, practically counting her dance steps as she prayed not to fall.  Bless her heart.  Oh, bless her heart.    

I was happy with the results except for Alan Arkin, everyone looked pretty okay, Ellen was good, it was too long, Reese keeps looking better and better, Helen Mirren has amazing breasts, mimes are cool, the Will Ferrell/Jack Black/John C. Reilly bit was the best part, Gael Garcia Bernal looks better dirty and sweaty, Andre Leon Talley should not have told Jennifer Hudson to wear that space cape, Jack Nicholson is on Team Britney, the end.

Always a procrastinator, I finally saw Last King of Scotland this morning, so I have seen all of the movies nominated in the acting and Best Picture categories  (and all of the screenplay nominees except for Pan’s Labyrinth, and all of the Best Director nominees except Paul Greengrass’s United 93).  Here’s how I would have voted:

Best Picture 

Little Miss Sunshine — Delightful, but would never have made the Oscar ballot in a normal year.  This year was terrible for movies overall, in my opinion, and I’m sorry, while LMS was fun and cute (and Olive’s pageant performance is outstanding), I’m not voting for a movie that actually inclued a “we’ve got a dead body in the trunk” joke.

The Queen — One of my favorite movies of the year, but felt like a really, really excellent television movie.  The performances were wonderful but it didn’t have the depth that I like to see in a Best Picture winner.  I still really liked it, though.

Babel — Again, I actually liked it quite a lot, but I don’t think it would have made my shortlist in a year that was populated with better films. 

The Departed — For a long time, this was my pick for Best Picture, and I would be perfectly happy if it won tomorrow night.  I think it’s Scorsese’s best since Goodfellas.  However, after mulling it over for a few weeks — and after seeing The Departed for the second time — I have to say that it’s moved to second place on my list.  I would not be disappointed if it won, though.

Letters from Iwo Jima — It was hard to watch simply because of the subject matter, but I don’t have any criticism of it, really.  Letters managed what many war movies do not — to combine the action of battle with genuine, fully realized characters.  Flawless.  It has my vote for Best Picture, though I do not predict it will tomorrow night. 

Best Actor 

Leonardo DiCaprio, Blood Diamond — Don’t make me talk about Blood Diamond anymore.  Leo’s performance was excellent, but I would have nominated him in The Departed instead, mostly because I just liked the latter movie better.

Forest Whitaker, Last King of Scotland — I actually liked the movie more than I thought I would, and while I understand the criticism that his was more of a supporting role, I think it was large enough that it was understandable that he is in the lead category.  It certainly wasn’t as gross a mischaracterization as giving Jennifer Hudson a supporting nomination.  In a perfect world, I would have preferred seeing James McAvoy get a lead nomination and Forest Whitaker get a supporting nomination — or even better, they both could have gotten lead nods.  McAvoy certainly could have replaced our next nominee…

Will Smith, The Pursuit of Happyness [sic]— He was great, but the movie was not Oscar caliber , and the role just wasn’t exciting or memorable enough.   

Ryan Gosling, Half Nelson — An incredible performance in a very small movie, one that reminded of Edward Norton in a couple of his earliest roles, Primal Fear and American History X, simply because it was that impressive.  I thought immediately that Gosling deserved Oscar recognition for his subtle, convincing, and heartbreaking portrayal of a good teacher with a bad addiction.  I am so thrilled that he got a nomination.  However, my Oscar vote might have to go to…

Peter O’Toole, Venus —  In one of my favorite movies of the year — the scene of O’Toole dancing with his old friend may have been my pick for best scene of the year — O’Toole manages to make the lead character charming, lecherous, pitiful, loving, and noble all at once.  I was absolutely moved.  However, I’m fine with Forest Whitaker winning too.  He was captivating as well and I sort of want to give him a hug.

Best Actress 

Kate Winslet, Little Children — Damned if Kate isn’t the best actress of my generation.  Little Children may be one of my favorite roles of hers.  She is perfect in every scene (and Oscars aren’t given for good accents, but her American accent is spot on). 

Meryl Streep, The Devil Wears Prada — Yes, she was fantastic, but I don’t really want to give Meryl Streep another Oscar for a movie that wasn’t otherwise that great, when we have Helen, Kate, and Judi in the running.

Penelope Cruz, Volver — I liked Volver pretty well, and I thought Penelope Cruz did a good job in it, which is a pretty big feat because I usually think that in American movies she is fairly dreadful.  However, in my mind she’s not even close to Kate, Helen, or Judi.  Nowhere near.  

Helen Mirren, The Queen — It really is remarkable how completely Helen Mirren disappeared into her role as Queen Elizabeth II.  She managed to make the queen stiff but sympathetic, cold but endearing, and always seemed authentic.  I think she’ll probably win, but my vote would have gone to…

Judi Dench, Notes on a Scandal — She was pathetic and terrifying all at once, and I can’t imagine that anyone watched Notes wasn’t awed.  I give her the slight edge on my ballot because I  find myself rooting for actors who create a character rather than those who portray a real person (the actual Oscar voters clearly do not agree).  Maybe that’s leftover trauma from Philip Seymour Hoffman winning over Heath Ledger last year (not that I don’t love PSH — I totally do). 

Best Supporting Actor 

Alan Arkin, Little Miss Sunshine —  Liked him, liked the movie, but didn’t think it was special enough to warrant a win, especially considering his competition.

Mark Wahlberg, The Departed — Definitely the most bad-ass nominee.  If he won, I would think it was pretty cool, but — as much as it pains me to say this — other people could have played the role almost as well.  (Don’t you think that, while they were really good in the roles they DID have, Matt Damon and Wahlberg could have switched and the movie would still have been awesome?)

Eddie Murphy, Dreamgirls — Well, in Dreamgirls, Eddie Murphy did what I thought that was impossible:  made me like him.  He and Jennifer Hudson were certainly the best parts of the movie, but in the weeks since I have seen the film, I’ve come around to the mindset that there were more substantive performances in the supporting category this year that should be recognized instead.     

Djimon Hounsou, Blood Diamond — I am a huge Hounsou fan, and he was wonderful in this, as usual, but I am so fully in the Jackie Earle Haley camp that everyone else pales in comparison.  That’s right, my vote would easily go to …

Jackie Earle Haley, Little Children — If there is one upset of the night, I hope this is it.  Haley manages to go from pitiable to loathsome to disgusting to almost lovable.  He was leagues ahead of everyone else in this category, in my opinion.  

Best Supporting Actress 

(Note:  I think the most egregious oversight this year was the failure to nominate Phyllis Somerville for Little Children.  If she were nominated, she would have my vote.) 

Abigail Breslin, Little Miss Sunshine — She was precious and it’s really cool that she got nominated, but her performance wasn’t even in the same ballpark as the others.  It’s not her fault — it just wasn’t an Oscar role.  I like that she’s bringing her Curious George doll to the Oscars with her, though.  I have a soft spot for anyone who has a special stuffed animal friend.

Jennifer Hudson, Dreamgirls — If she wins, and I certainly think she will (how sad will it be if she DOESN’T, considering all the hype leading up to tonight?), let’s just acknowledge it’s not really because of the actual acting, it’s because of how great she was when she sang “And I Am Telling You (I’m Not Going),” which was one of my favorite moments of the year on film.

Cate Blanchett, Notes on a Scandal — She can do anything.  Watching her onscreen with Judi Dench was a real thrill.  If she won, I’d think it was perfectly deserved, even though my vote might have gone to one of the Babel stars.

Adriana Barraza, Babel — A really inspired performance that I am thrilled was recognized with a nomination, but the most impressive part of Babel was her fellow nominee…

Rinko Kikuchi, Babel — She was wonderfully restrained, but still managed to convey the character’s desperate loneliness without even saying one word.  Amazing.  (I’m really torn on this category, though.  Love Cate, have sentimental affection for Jennifer, and really respect Rinko.  Any of the three would make me happy.)

Best Director 

Paul Greengrass, United 93 — Haven’t seen it and might not ever be able to.  

Stephen Frears, The Queen — Like I said, I really loved the movie, but I just don’t think he can (or should) win out over Scorsese or  Eastwood, whose movies were just superior. 

Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu, Babel — Ditto.

Martin Scorsese, The Departed — I think it should finally be Scorsese’s turn, but I am so, so torn because Eastwood is just so great and Letters from Iwo Jima was, as I said earlier, pretty much perfect.  So, my vote would have to go to…

Clint Eastwood, Letters from Iwo Jima — Still, if Scorsese wins, I will be perfectly happy. 

(Now, who I do think will actually win?  I reserve the right to change my mind until the Oscars begin — I’ll let you know if any of these switch — but for now I predict The Departed, Martin Scorsese, Forest Whitaker, Helen Mirren, Eddie Murphy, and  Jennifer Hudson, with Little Miss Sunshine and The Departed winning the screenplay categories.  That would mean absolutely zero surprises, so I hope I’m wrong about at least one — and I hope that one is Best Supporting Actor.)

I think this Oscar season has finally done it.  I think the nominees might have finally ruined depressing movies for me forever.  I can’t handle anymore.  I saw Little Miss Sunshine and The Queen too long ago for those to help me with the despair that the others have caused more recently.  Please, please, can I go see a double-feature of that new Jennifer Garner movie and the new Mandy Moore movie?  Followed by the Drew Barrymore/Hugh Grant vehicle?  Anything heavier and I will have to be committed. 

Let’s review:

The Departed — No spoilers here but it’s, um,  a wee bit bloody.  Lots of casualties.

Blood Diamond — No need to revisit.  We already know that this one almost put me in the hospital. 

Letters from Iwo Jima — There was totally one scene where I think I saw intestines on the outside of someone’s body.

Babel — Again, no spoilers, but I’ll just say it’s pretty harrowing. 

Children of Men — I was so desensitized by the time I saw this one that the pre-apocalyptic nature of it almost didn’t bother me.

Notes on a Scandal — Not as physically gruesome as the others but just as emotionally taxing.  This one’s no romp in the park.

Even The Pursuit of Happyness [sic] focuses way more on the “pursuit” (that is, the miserable part).  As soon as you get to the happiness part, the credits start rolling.

 And I just saw Venus, which I loved, and which I would almost categorize as a feel-good movie (especially within this crop), but you know, it’s not really a picnic either, what with being about an elderly lech and the vulnerable young girl with whom he becomes besotted.

So, I am very, very sorry, Forest Whitaker, but I am not sure whether I am going to be able to see you in The Last King of Scotland.  I believe that Ugandan dictator movies are not really what I am looking for right now.  Thank you for understanding.

RYAN GOSLING for Best Actor in Half-Nelson!

I’m sorry, were there others?   I got distracted by thoughts of Ryan Gosling. 

I have not seen Letters from Iwo Jima, but I am glad that Dreamgirls did not get nominated for Best Picture because all four of the other nominees (Babel, Little Miss Sunshine, The Queen, and The Departed) were all much better than Dreamgirls.  I think they got the Dreamgirls nominations right — Eddie Murphy and Jennifer Hudson were the best parts of that movie.

I was slightly disappointed that Leo got nominated for Blood Diamond instead of The Departed, but both were excellent performances.   

 Jake and I just watched Little Miss Sunshine again this weekend so I was pleased that sweet little Abigail Breslin got a nomination. 

I was glad that both Cate Blanchett and Judi Dench got nominated for Notes on a Scandal, because watching them together was maybe the best collective acting that I’ve ever seen.  Okay, maybe that’s an exaggeration, but that’s what it felt like.   

I feel kind of bad for Emily Blunt, who really was so good in The Devil Wears Prada, only because people had been talking and talking about her so much and you know she might have been getting her hopes up.  I love that both supporting actresses from Babel got nominated, but it doesn’t really matter because Jennifer Hudson is going to win, right?  

I’m pretty happy for Mark Wahlberg and Djimon Hounsou in the Supporting Actor category, too.  I do love Mark Wahlberg and he was pretty freaking awesome in The Departed.  And Djimon Hounsou is always good; I just watched In America again and I will forever love anyone who had anything to do with that sweet little movie, which is one of my favorites.  Obviously Eddie Murphy is the frontrunner, though, and deservedly so.  I haven’t even seen Little Children yet but I’m pleased for Jackie Earl Hailey too because his is sort of the fallen child star comeback story, and I love those.  (He was in The Bad News Bears as a kid, and something else I can’t remember, and then kind of fell out of acting and now look!  He’s an Oscar nominee!)

 But really, though.  It’s all about Gosling.  (I know he has no chance and I adore Forest Whitaker, who is practically a lock at this point, but still.  I’m enjoying the nomination.)  At the very least, this means we’ll get to see Ryan Gosling walk the red carpet and I think we can all agree that we will all be luckier for it.